Reply to Are there ramifications for being a SAHM?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don’t underestimate the relationship implications.  It seems to hit the worst after the kids are in school…. Even a half way decent partner understands how hard it is to deal with littles all day.  And the cost of childcare alone makes it worth it in many cases.

But once the kids are in school full time, that’s when it’s sooo easy to fall into the “what were you doing all day?” from the working spouse, and the wife wanting a break on the weekends but the husband thinking that’s HIS break and free time from work…. The bean counting of chores, etc.

Of course this doesn’t always happen.  But the danger point seems to be somewhere in that area after the kids are in school full time and the SAHM doesn’t return to work.

Then there is the awkward social aspect…. If you go with your DH to work events, what are you going to talk to people about? Kids? Play dates? [/quote]

You are making this harder than it needs to be. First off, lots of people just go back to work after kids are in school, whether in their old career or a new one and sometimes with a pivot to something more family friendly or that they enjoy more (it is easier to be a working parent if you don't hate your job so having a job you don't loathe matters).

If you have strong marriage no one will ever ask you "what are you doing all day."  If this is how you and your spouse interact, you will also struggle with being dual income (which generally requires MORE communication and respect, no less).

And if your only options for making conversation at events are (1) your current job, or (2) kids and playdates, then you are just bad at conversation. Read a book or listen to a podcast or something. I only talk work at a social event if it's literally a workplace event and in that case you have to literally work in the office to follow that anyway.[/quote]

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