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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It’s a risk, and saying it isn’t is lying. How long have you been married? At 20 years you would be entitled to alimony as a SAHP in many states, but if less you can be out with nothing.  Do you have assets that are not co-mingled and solely in your name? How do your retirement accounts look?

That’s the financial implications.

On the family implications, [b]the studies are pretty clear that being raised by SAHM’s means girls will earn less money. That may or may not be fine with you. Anecdotally, it impacts how much respect boys will have for women but the data is less clear. [/b]What will this mean for your children’s education? Will they still go to camp?

And then the relationship implications. This depends on your spouse. If his attraction to you is predicated on you having a really interesting and dynamic life away from the marriage than yeah, it’s going to be a struggle in the toddler years. Different strokes for different folks.[/quote]

NP. Can you please provide links for these studies you mention? I tend to be skeptical when studies get mentioned but aren't provided. And I would question how old that information is re: "being raised by SAHMs means girls will earn less money." That's a pretty sweeping conclusion and surely involves a lot of variables. Same re: how much "respect boys wiil have for women" -- are you implying that boys supposedly have less respect for women if their mother is SAH? Again, sweeping and extremely generalized. Which is why I'm wondering about the specific sources, dates, and methodologies of these "studies." If they were conducted over long periods, by reputable, objective social scientists in scientifically valid and replicable ways, that's one thing. If they're by organizations with agendas behind them, that's entirely different. And I say the same about any study on any subject cited without links on DCUM. [/quote]

Of course watching one person spend their day cleaning bathtubs, and vacuuming, and changing diapers vs getting dressed up,  have a nice office and secretary and perks (like a driver or work travel) is going to impact what children think about  male vs female capabilities and value. It just will.

I think child care is super impactful, and it was my most important job. But children see the literal tasks and working conditions that each gender takes on (not the nuanced social contribution). That leaves a mark on their perceptions.[/quote]

The great majority of the SAHMs I knew when I was a SAHM with preschool children returned to work when the kids were in elementary school, including myself. My kids know I was at home when they were little but don't really remember it. They know me more as a working mom.
You can do different things throughout your life.[/quote]

+1. Being a SAHM for part of your kid’s childhood doesn’t mean you are foresaking paid work for the rest of your life….[/quote]

Its always so weird when I read these threads. It is possible and common for SAHMs to return to the workforce. So a lot of "advice" is not applicable. [/quote]

DCUM seems to think it’s common and easy to go back to a great job after being out of the workforce for 10 years but in my own life I have never seen it happen a single time outside of a few specific professions: nurse/OT/PT or teacher. A couple women tried to retrain for some new field with very limited success and they earn basically nothing but keep themselves busy (which is fine if they don’t need the money obviously). One is going back for a masters in social work and I think she’s going to do great. But acting like it’s common across all professions is not at all consistent with what I have observed. 
[/quote]

In my  experience    this is true. It tends to work if the woman was relatively established in her career and was out less than 5 years and[b] kept current with the field[/b]

[/quote]

People say this but I don’t really know what it means. How current can you be if you aren’t working?  [/quote]

If you know you are going back in a few years you maintain contacts, continue to network, and continue to follow industry news. Linked In is your friend and you check in once or twice a week and and continue to stay in touch with colleagues.

I did this and actually got multiple job offers before I was ready to go back to work. I wound up doing some consulting gigs when my kids were preschool aged and one of those turned into a job.

I know a number of professional women who followed a similar path. If you are established in your career and good at your job it's not that hard-- it's hard to find good, experienced people and I have to be that absolutely no one cares about a 4-5 year absence for kids. At all.[/quote]

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