Reply to Ranting about ex wife introducing our kids to her boyfriend

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, it's easy in therapy to focus on things you can't control, that will just drive your anxiety as you ruminate. You cannot control ex or who she brings the kids around. Putting the kids first is actually focusing on processing your own feelings in therapy so it does not become something that impacts your relationship with the kids.

Focus on processing your feelings so you can be there for them and their feelings. I get you want to believe you will never be around the guy but would you really miss the school play, sports event, wedding of your kid, if it comes to that? Finding a men's group can give you role models of how to move past.

I have relatives where they all spend holidays with kids and grandkids and it's great for the children. They don't get a choice either. Both of the parents re-married. The kids don't have to be without parents for big events or shuttle around on holidays. The best thing you can do is to process and move past in a way that puts them first. It's not easy, but it is possible. [/quote]

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