Reply to My sister and BIL want me to ask my husband to get their son a lucrative job

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My biggest issue with this thread is OP being a gatekeeper to her husband. This seems like an easy conversation between husband and wife. “Honey, SIL and BIL want your help getting Nephew a job at your company. I’m not sure if he’s qualified, but can you take a look at his resume and give him some advice?”

That’s it! You’re not putting his career on the line by asking him a simple question. He is a big boy and can decide if/how he can help. If you’re actually right and he’s completely unqualified, your husband can help him forge a path in the upcoming years. This can be as little as an email explanation or as much as a mentorship depending on his availability and closeness with the nephew. [/quote]
That is your big issue? Not the fact that the nephew didn't contact the husband himself, like a "big boy"?[/quote]

Honestly, yes. There are a LOT of issues with this post, and I certainly agree that the nephew should have contacted his uncle if he wants to be a career go-getter. But OP should have this conversation with her husband. For all I care, they have a laugh about the nephew’s lack of experience and ambition over breakfast. But DH should be the decision-maker of how to handle this, not DCUM. Though I appreciate the entertainment of these posts over my coffee. [/quote]

I disagree. My DW family is very hierarchical and formal, and a child approaching an adult directly would be considered very gauche. It needs to start within the core family, ie sister to sister.

It clear that OP and her DH are not warm or friendly with her hick relatives, as there is no relationship between the BILs for example — I am close to my DW sister DH and we exchange career advice for ourselves and our kids all the time. [/quote]

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