Reply to Can you ever really forget someone you once loved?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve never forgotten any of the guys I really loved, but only a couple haunt me on a regular basis.

I just found out last week that the man I loved in law school died a year ago. I’m gutted to know he’s gone from this world. He is actually the someone I probably should have taken the plunge with, but I was terrified of his love and ran away. I hurt him then on the theory that I wouldn’t hurt him and he wouldn’t hurt me if we broke up then instead of someday in the future after our hearts had been broken. The only winning move is not to play, right?

Neither of us ever married or were in a long term serious relationship. He’s still the person I have conversations with in my head and carried in my heart all these 25 years since.

The grief and regret are bad but then I think, what if in a relationship I’d grown from love to contempt and didn’t even care that he’d died? The worst case scenario would have been if we’d had a healthy loving joyful relationship for 25 years and then I had to try to move on without him.

As it is I’m used to being alone and being haunted. When I see women who are haunted by betrayals I feel it’s okay to prefer to be haunted by what ifs. [/quote]

Pp, I woke up thinking about this post.  I wish you would show your younger self more grace and trust.  She wasn’t a complete lunatic and she might have understood or noted things you forgot about.[/quote]

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