Reply to Money, college and exILs

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well, they can stop seeing their grandparents now if they don’t want to. 
And definitely no more driving them there unless it’s in your own interest.
At least you are free from this one obligation! 
[/quote]
Aren’t you petty ![/quote]

It's not about the money.  It's about promises made - repeatedly -  promises broken, and a refusal to even answer phone calls!  That is super sh*tty behavior.  I wouldn't blame the kids if they wanted nothing to do with their grandparents after this.

IT'S NOT THE MONEY.[/quote]

It may not be about the money, but your repeated insistence on proving a point to the grandparents is ticky-tacky. [/quote]

NP. I think your post is more tacky than anything OP has done.[/quote]

Why?

Grandparents are embarrassed about not providing for the kids after promising the money would be there. Why does OP need to make them feel worse?

Zoom out for a minute, the grandparents have 5 additional grandkids that (I’m guessing) are local to them and a bum of a son living in their house. The 5 other kids came after the first 3 so the initial promises were made so the circumstances have changed. And maybe other siblings have had kids, the grandparents health has changed, whatever.

What does pointing out to the grandparents (with screenshots) that they stink for not following thru do for anyone?[/quote]

People need to be held accountable for their words and actions. We even teach children this. The grandparents aren’t babies and shouldn’t have made multiple written and verbal promises to pay for their grandkids over the years if they weren’t sure about it. And this isn’t about promising to pay for clothes or a car, it’s college. Their behavior is despicable and so is anyone who defends it. [/quote]

What will change if you sit the grandparents down and make them apologize? It will drive a wedge in the relationship. If I’m your kid, I’m learning that money > relationships from that interaction. [/quote]

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