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Reply to "Do you agree or disagree with this: Parents should pay for undergrad tuition"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For all of you who don't plan to pay for your kids college education, let me assure you that they will be pushed out of jobs by[b] immigrants whose parents lived in shacks so their kids could get the best possible education. Indian, Korean, Chinese families sacrifice EVERYTHING so their kids can get the best possible education. [/b] Later those same kids help the elderly parents because they are able. This discussion, right here, on this thread is why the U.S. is going to become second world very soon. [/quote] I am one of those immigrants (though I live quite comfortably). I said previously that I would only pay for a top school tuition and only on my own terms (i.e. children get to choose their major only from a pro-approved list created by me and DH).[b] It is hard for me to imagine immigrant parents giving their children free reigns in terms of exploring various college majors etc. [/b]Also, more than many here (and this despite both me and DH being PhDs) we are willing to accept that our children might not be good enough for college and that there other honorable ways to make a living. We are certainly not going to pay $$$ so that children can have a "college experience".[/quote] I am also from one of those immigrant groups - my parents immigrated, and my husband immigrated. Dad's family was dirt-poor; he's an engineer. My parents came here for opportunity. The last thing my parents would want me to do is waste an education on something that didn't interest me at all. [b]Can you imagine not wanting to be an engineer, and then spending 9 hours a day being an engineer? Soul sucking. [/b] I don't know a single immigrant parent that made the kinds of ultimatums you suggest - it's the exception, rather than the norm in our community, actually. We find out about it from the rumor mill. "Oh, he left school - he really wanted to be an English major, but his mom made him go to the business school." [/quote] This is why I would never limit choices just to engineers. Doctors and lawyers are also acceptable (in fact, medicine is preferable). There is so much variety in careers in medicine (clinical work, lab work, managerial work, teaching work...) alone that there is something for everyone. [b]Maybe in your community the rule is to have children decide what they want to study on their parents' dime. If so, this is merely a reflection of a generational family cycle where movers and shakers are eventually replaced by "artists" or just plain bums.[/[/b]quote] Well, no. You can be successful outside the fields of law and medicine. FWIW, i am an attorney, but my parents had no say in my choice of major or graduate school. I was considering going to school to become an urban planner. I asked my dad point blank whether that was "good enough". He said, as long as you apply yourself 100% it will of course be good enough. Did you ever take any courses in music, art or English? The most challenging courses I took in college were in art history and english. By comparison, I sailed through statistics, econometrics and economics. One wonderful thing about college is that I came to value disciplines other than those that I was interested in or excelled at. My personal view is that undergraduate education is, more than anything else, about learning how to learn. It is not vocational school. You immerse yourself into one subject and learn to think critically. That's why you have people in all kinds of professional school who majored in English, Music, Anthroplogy, etc. Would you be disappointed if your children taught art to lower-income kids? It sounds like you would, and that is terribly depressing . If I had chosen that route, I know that my parents would have been proud of me. Having seen your philosophy play out before, I can tell you that taking your children's passions and telling them that those passions are worthless and irrelevant will damage your relationship with your children. I hope that as your children get older you reform your views. [/quote]
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