Reply to Would you confront your husband/wife's Emotional Affair lover?

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[quote=Anonymous]I'd be open to an apology, but like the pp said, it would not be believable unless it was tied to some evidence of genuine remorse and change.

Luckily (or not) my DH carried on most of his affairs through chat so I have evidence of what the other women (plural) thought about what they were doing. Quite enlightening. My DH purposely chose really unattractive women whom he would never consider IRL and who would be desperate enough to be satisfied with being used. In a number of cases the women actually told him they purposely go after the husbands of attractive women because it gives them a kick to steal a man from a beautiful woman. I'd have a hard time with an apology from that kind of woman because they purposely went out to hurt me. In the other cases, you can see that the women truly thought they had a connection and that this would eventually turn into a real relationship. (DH is a skilled liar. Why do more OW not understand that if he'll lie to his wife he's lying to you?) I'm more inclined to accept an apology from those gals, provided they showed evidence that they really understand what they did and why and that they have closed the wounds that made them think that was an acceptable way to behave.[/quote]

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