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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We don’t allow sleepovers, period. Why are people so outraged and appalled by a “no” to sleepovers? It’s bizarre.

My kids have traveled with school groups and sports, gone out of town with relatives, etc. We can easily say a simple “no, sorry” to a party or anything else as needed, but no to a sleepover in a private home is met with “oh no! why not?! what other dates work?!” from other parents and their kids. I just don’t get why it is so important and why such a big push for these events.[/quote]

A strict “no sleepovers” policy is too often borne out of a parent’s transphobic prejudice.[/quote]

I think it’s former sexual assault or childhood abuse.

[/quote]

This. The parent is likely a survivor of childhood sexual abuse.[/quote]

We only allowed sleepovers when our kids were middle school or older and then only if we knew the parents well.
My DH's best friend was molested by a friend's dad, who happened to be their pastor.  DH witnessed that trauma and was adamant that our kids not be put in that situation.  
[/quote]

Next time OPs child is invited to a sleepover, she should decline by saying she doesn’t want her child sexually abused. I’m sure she won’t be bugged about sleepovers after that.[/quote]

Actually, I know you meant this sarcastically but it’s not a bad idea if they are willing to engage in the conversation. As a midwife I’m very aware of how many of my patients report a history of sexual abuse in childhood and as a mother I will do my best to prevent my children from suffering a similar trauma. Opening the conversation with families is helpful for letting everyone know their concerns, building awareness and other conversations. For example, we recently allowed a sleepover party with a group of friends for the first time and the family volunteered that they had 1 gun, in a locked gun safe in their bedroom and that no one would have access to the room period. Additionally that because of the hosting responsibilities they were laying out their commitment that there would be zero drinking on the parents part all night and that older siblings of the opposite sex would be kept separate. It made it much easier for my DH and I to feel confident in allowing our daughter to attend. [/quote]

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