Reply to Parents of three, do you feel less bonded to your third?

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Reply to "Parents of three, do you feel less bonded to your third?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here's the thing. I am not mad, I am annoyed by the typical DCUM inability to read, reflect and respond if/only if you have thoughtful and on topic advice. I don't care if it's not "perfect" advice or advice I would give, but it has to follow some sort of general thought process...

A parent of three children asked specifically about losing/lack of bond with their third children. 
 
Aside from a few comments from parents of three, the direction the comments took became "here's why you shouldn't have three children and why middle children are the worst, mainly because they don't get enough love or attention (all while subtly implying no one with a sane brain or decent job or concern for their children would have more than 2).  That's common DCUM narrative and its both not helpful in this particular situation and also annoying to hear again and again from a particular (loud) group of self righteous people.

In many other parts of the country and for much of our history 3, 4, and 5 children were not only normal but considered a healthy and thriving family. No one says it is easy - and why ADVICE could be so helpful here.  But the beating of up of larger families is tiresome.[/quote]

I am the person who posted on the first page of the thread that, typically, it is the bond with the middle child that suffers more in a family of 3. I was speaking of one of three and a parent of three. This is quite common and why people talk about middle children having specific issues or needs. I maintain this was on topic.

That a lot of grown middle kids chose to comment on this (both in agreement and not, I'll point out) is unsurprising.

By and large, parents of 3 tend to bond fine with the youngest, and I expect that OP will discover that bond grows as her youngest gets older. My main advice to OP, which I still think is good, is to be thoughtful about how she interacts with and treats her middle child as that is traditionally the relationship that suffers, not the one with the youngest.

My advice to you is to chill out. It's an anonymous message board. If you are getting this worked up about unhelpful or off topic posts, maybe you need a break from DCUM. It's not a big deal and it happens on almost every thread.[/quote]

+1
This is a very balanced answer.[/quote]

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