Reply to Parents of three, do you feel less bonded to your third?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am the PP who mentioned that parents of 1 or 2 chiming in and being self righteous were not being helpful. Several responded that you had to respond because you were grown adults and the product of three children. 
 
I neglected to point that out in my original post.  I am the middle and as this thread would lead you to believe, the worst possible outcome -  the second daughter followed by a baby brother.  My husband is also a middle child.  Guess what?  WE LOVE THE DYNAMIC.  Even if it at times, we felt the "burden" of being the middle, it made us both incredibly strong and resilant.  As adults, we both are probably the closest to our parents - perhaps because of personality or because our parents are also middle children and so we are all crazy.

Any parent with any number of children will tell you if they are being honest that there are moments of bonding and seasons of challenges relating to their children. And any parent of more than one child has to figure out how to split their time, energy and love.

OP - this to shall pass. Do not read into these ridiculous comments.  Anyone posting that they didn't have more children bc of their own childhood has more damage than birth order alone.  It's absurd to chalk up all the hostility and negative energy to just one factor.  Families with more children are more complicated and nuanced but there is also an incredible opportunity to have deep and meaningful sibling bonds that simply don't happen in smaller families.  [b]That's a fact.[/b]  [/quote]

Wow!  Fact huh?  YOU are the authority on smaller families having zero experience with them.  Hey, calling all psychologists around the world, not to mention OP, we have found the world’s perfect parent!  The middle child married to a middle child who has 3 or more children, but is also the expert authority on smaller families.  THAT IS A FACT she says!  She and her children are too perfect to respond to you OP.  They are unicorns.

For all the normal people out there, including OP.  There is lots of good useful info here.  Yes, the voices of those balanced people from 3 child families; those who decided to have less; those who decided to have 3 and are happy with their choice; and all ranges in between and beyond have great insight.  Summed up - there are seasons to parenting and the dynamics change with time.  My children are older and I can tell you this is true from my experience.  Your kids are young, just wait.  Enjoy each child where they are.  Some parents of 3 manage to build individual bonds with each successfully.  These parents are rare, but it is worth striving to achieve this.  Because others have done this successfully, you can too, OP.  You are in a great spot by recognizing you have a different bond with the baby.  Just know that it will change, and hopefully strengthen, with time.[/quote]

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