Reply to Negative impact of therapy and "therapy speak"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I do think there's a level of introspection that's unhealthy. I see it most in younger adults who don't have children yet. I even felt it in myself in my 20s. I felt untethered and had too much time to myself.

Now that I'm a parent it seems unreal to me how some young adults can cut off their parents for such minor things. Like a video I watched recently of a woman blaming her mom (always the mom...) for making her a people pleaser and saying that it was a trauma response. At some point you have to realize that your parents did the best they could do (absent REAL trauma like the ACE indicators) and everyone deserves grace. [/quote]

Amen.

I just interviewed a young woman who referred to a bad work experience as “her trauma” . Can we stop calling every unpleasant experience a “trauma” and go back to teaching resiliency and empowerment?  YOU decide how you react and YOU decide to give people power. YOU decide to move on. These kids have been told to marinate in their self-pity instead. it’s self-absorbed, unproductive, and unhelpful.[/quote]

It isn't "marinating in self pity." That makes it sound like just sinking into quicksand. The therapy is to process it, work through the feelings and find the lessons in it so you don't get into another similar situation. People need time to talk through these things to move forward.

I have been through a lot in my life-probably faced a lot more adversity than many on this board. That said, I don't scoff at people having trouble coping with far less. I have no problem with a young woman describing a bad work situation as traumatic. Before I faced far worse, I might have done the same. Because I got therapy during my own traumatic work experience I learned ways to cope with the feelings so the next bad work situation was more manageable for me. We all go through developmental stages of dealing with life stresses. A 4 year old upset that her goldfish died should not be scoffed at. You validate her feelings, listen and help her work through them.

It does not hard YOU in any way when people go to therapy to learn coping skills and process things so they can build resilience. Meet people where they are. Don't have disdain for the teen crying over a breakup with a boyfriend or the 20-something with a terrible boss. If they recognize they need help from a professional that is a good thing.[/quote]

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