Reply to My girlfriend only wants to spend Christmas with her family. I think this is so selfish.

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Reply to "My girlfriend only wants to spend Christmas with her family. I think this is so selfish. "

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[quote=Anonymous]I haven’t read all the replies, but if you end up having kids you’ll probably want some years that you’re at your own home so it’s hard to predict how holidays will work.

We haven’t don’t Xmas with my in-laws in years. It’s not very fair to them in some respects, but it’s how it is. My siblings are home with their families every other year (as are we) and travel to my parents every other year. My sister’s in-laws live in the same town as her and my sister-in-law’s parents travel the two hours to see them every month or so (and / or will stay for a week at a time). (My brother and his wife actually live in the same town as my parents.). My parents just visited us across the country for the first time in 3 years and my in laws haven’t visited us in 6 years. It’s hard being the ones who travel! The Christmases that my siblings are home I want to see them and my nieces / nephews. My brother also has a child with whom he shares custody and they never know their schedule until last minute, but they split Christmas Day. So that can be hard to plan around. My in-laws are a 3 hr drive from my parents. We typically visit them a day or two after Christmas on the years we fly home. Sometimes we stay to New Year’s. Their 42 yr old son is unmarried / no kids and so there aren’t any cousins or other kids around. It seems more reasonable to have adults wait to do Xmas on the 27th or whatever even though there are ways that’s probably hard for them. It’s also hard because my whole extended family is very close so at Christmas there are gatherings with 30-40 aunts, uncles, cousins etc, going to the family church and all that. DH has no extended family he’s close to (and none near his parents) and no specific holiday traditions that can’t be moved to a different day. So, again, I get that it’s probably hard for my in-laws, but it’s what we do. They’d be welcome to visit us for Christmas the years we’re at home if they ever wanted to. [/quote]

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