Reply to Are men happier than women in marriage at midlife?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's amazing to me to contrast the comments in this thread--where everyone seems certain that women are screwed over by marriage--with the threads where women are pissed that they can't get a man to settle down and marry. Why is it that worldly, well educated women want something that is so bad for them?[/quote]
Because they want children and unfortunately society still shames never-married single mothers.[/quote]

Exactly. And it's just easier with a spouse. That doesn't mean that 20 years later they're still benefitting from being married. Women initiate most divorces and remarry less.[/quote]

So they are misrepresenting their long term intentions or just don't know that it turns out to be terrible (despite the supposed common knowledge)?[/quote]

Are all men you meet the same? Well, all women are not the same. Some women are not capable of marriage and enter into it misrepresenting themselves. Others enter into it misrepresenting the other person. Some get it right. Some get it right and then get it wrong. There is no same pattern for everyone in life. How old are the people commenting here? It's like I'm talking to 15 year olds.[/quote]

Of course "not all women" or "not all men." But the primary argument in this thread is that it is well known/well documented that marriage is generally a raw deal for women. So if that's true, then it doesn't square with the countless threads about women wanting to lock down a noncommittal man for marriage. [/quote]
Smart women aren’t trying to lock down a “noncommittal” man. Some women think they can change a noncommittal man, but it usually doesn’t work out well for them in the long run. There are men who actually do desire marriage and a family.[/quote]

Women love and chase men who are unavailable. I've seen it too often in life to believe anything else. [/quote]

Revealed preferences are a thing. Women supposedly benefit the least from marriage but want it the most. And men supposedly benefit the most and want it the least. [/quote]

Ever heard of Occam's razor?  Generally, if women want marriage the most, you can assume it's because it benefits them the most.  And the inverse goes for men.[/quote]

Exactly. My advice to my son: don't ever get married. My advice to my daughter: get married to someone who makes more than you.

Why do I give such advice? Because I love my children. [/quote]

With sons, you worry less.  There is no biological clock or other reasons to force themselves into a marriage.  Societal pressure isn’t there for them.[/quote]

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