Reply to Close friend thinks her DD walks on water and... reality is different...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Almost invariably people who think their kids walk on water have awful kids. The two are not unrelated. [/quote]

Agree... also there is a huge difference between thinking that your kid is awesome and special, which obviously almost all parents do, and feeling the need to TELL people how awesome and special your kid is. [/quote]

This!

I posted earlier about my neighbor who dropped me because I didn’t worship her perfect daughter. The whole neighborhood is on to (and annoyed by) her now. A few of us were sitting in the front yard once for happy hour. She walked by, stopped to chat, and we all had to hear how not only was her daughter going to XYZ for high school, but she was accepted into the HONORS PROGRAM. We all had a good laugh over that.  Dial it back, lady. We don’t care. [/quote]

There's a common phenomenon where groups of people placate the biggest crazy in the group. Since you are the center of socialization in the neighborhood and hosting "happy hour" (gossip and booze), it's pretty safe to say people are agreeing with you because that's the path of least resistance/causes the least friction to the group. You can bet that when you aren't around they talk about what a tiny little hater you are.[/quote]

Wow you’re generalizing a lot here. We rotate who hosts happy hour. That specific day just happened to be at my house. Also, this was a mix of males and females, in case you’d like to generalize about that. 
Any other facts you’d like to make up and run with?[/quote]

Sorry, but you do not sound like someone willing to be the bigger person in this situation. The high road would be acknowledging that this friend and her daughter have a toxic dynamic, distancing yourself, and kindly changing the subject when it comes up. Not forming a reality show alliance with the rest of the Happy Hour rotation gang and “having a good laugh.”[/quote]

DP but you're really doing the most here to avoid laying any blame at the feet of the braggart. I've known people like this. They never ask how my kids are doing or can deign to remember what their names are. Maybe you're feeling sensitive because this is routinely how you act in public. If so, cut it out. It's off-putting and doesn't endear you or your kids to anyone.[/quote]

In your case it sounds like there are other issues (eg, not asking about your kid or remembering their names).  A person, without anything else, who gets annoyed about a parent praising their kid (even over praising their kid) is the one with the issues. [/quote]

Not really. It's called being humble and having humility. Virtues as important as "being the bigger person". Why does someone need to praise and over praise their kid to others? What part of good manners and etiquette does that stem from?[/quote]

Thanks for showing us good manners and etiquette by doing things like gossiping with the neighbors.[/quote]

You need to pick a side. If you defend one persons' right to be rude, why not the other? Rudeness is either ok or its not. It's not ok sometimes. If neighbor has the right to be a boor, why don't the happy hour crew?[/quote]

I don't actually have to pick a side.  OP is writing so the discussion revolves around what someone listening to the bragging should do.  If her neighbor friend was writing I might have something else to say.

But you realize that just because the neighbor was supposedly rude, OP and the neighbors don't get a pass on being rude?  I cannot believe I have to type that out.  But DCUM has certainly shown me that there are many people who grown into adult bodies but not adult maturity.[/quote]

But many here are refusing to call neighbors behavior rude. They think it’s perfectly reasonable so it’s hard to take them seriously criticizing the other group’s behavior seriously. They don’t understand rude behavior to begin with.[/quote]

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