Reply to S/O being excluded from birthday parties

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Reply to "S/O being excluded from birthday parties"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]I think you're ignoring that most people, myself included, think the fault here lies with YOU, not your daughter.  I do agree that people calling her names are out of line - for cryin' out loud people, she's 7.  But all the more reason for an adult to steer her in the right direction.  And unfortunately, you failed her.  But you seem incapable of any sort of mature self-reflection.  [/quote]

No, that's where you're wrong. You have no standing to assign "fault" because no wrong was done. Your perspective simply isn't valid. I didn't "fail" her. Where do you get that?

Please tell me what the lesson is in demanding a child invite someone to her party she doesn't want to have there? [/quote]

Well, I'm glad to see you are, in fact, capable of mature self-reflection.  My mistake.

There have been more than 100 posts pointing out what you did wrong, from a parenting perspective.  Just for starters, you hide behind the "I let her choose" point - but you knew full well that her choice was going to be hurtful to another girl - and you've claimed she doesn't dislike the girl.  But you didn't intervent.  That's bad parenting.  As I said before, giving 7 yos control is great, but not when the consequences of their actions are to hurt other kids.  You abdicated your responsibility to your daughter, and allowed another little 7 yo girl to get her feelings hurt - but apparently you don't care about that.  And from what I can discern from your earlier posts, this is because you yourself don't approve of the other kid.

I get that you aren't willing to be swayed bu others' positions.  I hope that's because you feel like your daughter has been attacked, and your back is up.  If so, it's understandable.  But if you really, truly don't feel like you handled this poorly as a parent - well, that's sad.

(Plus, "standing" has nothing to do with who is right and who is wrong.  But I digress.)

The lesson is that reciprocity for birthday parties that are on the same weekend is the nice thing to do.  And that [/quote]

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