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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing.   With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to.   I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly.   They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.[/quote]

Okay. You are supposed to be the adult here. It’s time to grow up and fake it until you make it.  BTDT. My kid went from a largely Asian magnet high school and applied to SLACs.  They are now attending their first choice, which is a great school and a great fit.  My kid loves it and has had amazing opportunities.  But most parents in my kid’s HS had never heard of the school and therefore assumed my kid had failed somehow because they were not attending a T30 with a nationally recognized name. And I got comments like, “why would you pay for a college no one has ever heard of”— which says more about their ignorance than my kid’s success in HS or lack thereof.

So, two part strategy:

1.   Don’t get pulled into listing acceptances and rejections about immediate family and maybe on very close, non-catty supportive friend. Until a decision is made, say “Larlo has asked us not to discuss college admissions until has has made a decision.“. Then pivot to “does your kid know where they are going?”

2.  Once a decision is made, put a smile on your face and fake enthusiasm. Look people in they eye, and say “Larlo has decided to attend Disappointment School and we are so excited for him.”  You set the tone. Smile and look people in the eye.  Refuse to apologize or admit disappointment or engage with cattiness. Buy the car sticker and the t- shirt.  And remember your. Kid is watching and will take their cues about their college from you. So if you can’t find genuine pride and enthusiasm, yeah—fake it.

[b]Plus, all the hard work was not for nothing. It was to prepare your kid to succeed in whatever college he attends.[/b] [/quote]

+1,000[/quote]

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