Reply to “The Harsh Reality of Gentle Parenting”

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People have pointed out that They have seen kids whose parents tried a gentle-parenting approach and who have no self-control, no boundaries, think they’re the center of the universe, etc.

Well I have seen parents who seemed delighted to tell their little kids that they needed to stop crying, who sent their kids to their rooms, who rolled their eyes at the conversations I had with my kids about feelings, etc. And now those little kids are teenagers who hate their parents and don’t want to talk to them.

Whereas my daughter tells me she is so glad I’m her mom, because I treat her like a human being who she can talk to because she knows I care about her.

So please stop with the dramatic anecdotes. They don’t mean a lot, especially when there is research out there. [/quote]

Again you are acting like the options are “gentle parenting” or abusive 1950s parenting. If it works for you to never say “stop it, Emma” and instead do the whole narrate their emotional state/give choices each and every time that’s great! The problem is acting like that’s the only way to be a non-Neanderthal parent (and when parents don’t regroup when their kids have serious behavior problems as older children.) I also have great teens who are glad I am their mom and I literally never yelled at them or said they were making me sad or whatever bland I gave them lots of choices. However I also used “cut it out” plenty and when they had something that was hard had no problem using kazdin style rewards for a bit. Both of those things are frowned upon by “gentle parenting” experts. [/quote]

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