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Reply to "the cost of working - SAHM vs WOHM"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]To be honest when my wife stopped working we estimated the first 60k of income was lost due to added expenses. But it is more than that. Once my wife stopped working I could work late, join outside professional organizations, work longer hours. Be available. Not always as not necessary. But I was not the run out the door type. Out of all my family and cousins my brother and I have the highest HHI with SAHM wives. I no longer make big money. But I was making 400k for a 15 year run that started when my kids were 6, 4 and a new born. No way could we manage that HHI with both working with 3 kids. Childcare, maid, take out, commute would have been nightmare and neither of us would have held a high paying job. My brother has held down a 400k to 650k job for 23 years. His. Wife quit when oldest was 1. [/quote] This was our experience too. I (DW) fought to stay in the labor market and did so for many years with 3 kids but after I quit due to a health crisis our HHI tripled with one earner. That doesn't happen to everyone but I know a number of families where the sole earner's income shot up dramatically once the juggling act ended. [/quote] Same here. I became a SAHM and my DH was able to get more professional credentials and certifications. We had always kept our COL low and we were doing a decent job of saving and investing, so with my quitting work, we were still able to accumulate wealth on one hand, but also my DH's salary went up a lot. With the pandemic and teens and DH working from home, the household has continued to work efficiently and smoothly because I am home and not doing an office job. [/quote] I don't really see how my DHs income could.get any higher. He's a surgeon and has a private practice. I actually enjoy working because I'd be alone so much if I didn't. We do have a wonderful nanny, as I'm also in medicine though I'm a nurse anathesologist. I have a pretty consistent schedule. My kids are now older and our nanny has transitioned into housekeeping amd driving the kids around. I have to say I'm honestly glad my life isn't hers. I get the best of times and get to scrap the grunt work. I don't really see much value in doing laundry, grocery shopping, and vacuuming. [/quote] I mean, isn’t your cushy lifestyle basically due to your husband’s high salary? If you’d married a teacher, you probably wouldn’t have been able to afford to keep your nanny on as a housekeeper. Most working moms in this country can barely afford childcare, let alone cleaners. This probably doesn’t apply to you bc I know nurse anesthetists make decent money, I’m reminded of an episode of the Double Shift podcast (feminist working mom podcast) where the hosts admitted that the only way they were both working was that their husbands made enough for them to afford childcare so they could do this podcast and other journalism work where they basically LOST money.[/quote]
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