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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm glad you have found helpful people to work with and have some relief.

This was your first paragraph of your first post, and it was the (absolutely frustrating, and absolutely very difficult) situation I was responding to:

[quote]I flew cross-country in the middle of a pandemic thinking my mother was on death's door. She (thankfully) survived and is at the end of acute rehab and going home tomorrow. My aunt lives nearby and is in end-stage cancer. I didn't know how end-stage it was until I got here [b](she sounds better on the phone then she actually is)[/b]. So I've been bouncing for the past two weeks between rehab and my aunt's home. The first thing my mother says when I get here is "oh good, now your sister can continue to work". Um, I had to close my business to come here on an open-ended timeframe.[/quote]

If she can sound of mind on the phone, she isn't going to be declared non-competent to choose -- and regardless, the hospice isn't going to make that determination.

But yes, if she becomes absolutely non-coherent and is obviously unable to make her own choices (and that bar is higher than you think), then she will get placement somewhere, regardless of what her wishes expressed to do used to be.

Either way, you can walk away at any time. Of course you can. But that doesn't mean anyone has to give her the personal attention you can't, over and above basic care for a medical patient. That has to be good enough, OP because it is what there is for her at that point, unless someone (aunt, you, etc.) pays for more. It sounds like someone will pay this new hospice service, and once she either accepts or can't decline, that may be the best outcome one could wish for here.[/quote]

That was a month ago. With end stage pancreatic cancer, it moves fast. I agree it has to be good enough. Things have looked up for sure. Thank you.[/quote]

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