Reply to Should I excuse DH from nighttime duties?

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Reply to "Should I excuse DH from nighttime duties?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I mean honestly, we all know this: there are plenty of dads who handle one feeding at night, go to work, come home at 6, then talk about how tired they are from waking up at night and proceed to sit on the couch while their wife handles the evening with the baby (after being alone with baby all day). Vs the husband who is rested from having slept the night before and is prepared to come home in the evening and take over for a few hours, put the baby in a carrier and make dinner while the mom relaxes.[/quote]

I mean this is a possible scenario but not one that is born out by anything other than ancdata.

The tl;dr of this whole thread is, the degree to which you care about egalitarian parenting should inform your decision. Because what research does show is a men who do not do equal care for newborns continue not to do equal care for children. An equally plausible scenario to your well rested guy with the baby in a carrier is the guy who just says “the baby likes you more” when they don’t know how to soothe their six week old and “you’re just better at this” about their clingy 16MO.

But it’s also possible not to particularly care about egalitarian parenting, be happy being the primary parent, and be satisfied with “helping out” from DH. If someone (OP or otherwise) wants that they should just say that’s what they want and recognize that’s what their advice points to for outcomes.[/quote]

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