Reply to Would you be okay with your wife visiting her male best friend

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My BFF since college is a guy who now lives out of state and married.  I used to visit him (san DH) before he got married.  We used to talk a lot too.  We never dated and never thought about dating.  DH doesn’t have any problem with it.  But my BFF’s wife is intimidated by my friendship with her husband.  So I don’t visit them solo anymore. When they visit, I go out of my way to avoid any alone time w my BFF just to make sure his wife doesn’t get the wrong idea.

It is really sad.  He is really like a good girlfriend to me.  We used to talk all night.  I had always have trouble making female friends (I only have 2 close female friends).  I am not good with gossiping or backstabbing.  I have always found friendship with guys being more simple and easy on the mind.  He and DH get along great.  But his wife is just very insecure led.    [/quote]

This is incredibly sexist and serves to only reinforce stereotypes. I’m a woman and also don’t enjoy gossip and backstabbing - neither do my many girlfriends. Sounds like you aren’t very good at making friends with intelligent, kind and interesting women. [/quote]

Did you miss the part that I have 2 close female friends?  If you aren't so quick to judge and trigger happy, I may take you as the intelligent, kind and interesting woman.   You just proved my point...

[/quote]

NP here. You were the one who said you had a hard time making female friends and guys were just so much easier all the while complaining about your guy friend's wife. We all know women like you. The 3 female friends you have look past your makor flaws and are probably hopeful they can help you grow as a person.[/quote]

Oh goodness, let the attach start.  I did say guys are easier to befriend and yes my best friend's wife is not as comfortable with our friendship.  So I am consistent, no?  What is the definition of women like me?  Go ahead and pile it on. [/quote]

In my experience, you have extremely low self-esteem,  misogynistic views, and thus overvalue and get validation by having a lot of male friends, your male friends are more likely to tolerate your BS rather than call you out on it and encourage your growth.   There are usually 1 or 2 women [b]willing to take you under their wing and encourage your growth[/b], unfortunately, the growth usually doesn't happen and they get tired of you as well.

It also reflects poorly on your friend that he maitains a friendship with someone who is so disrespectful of his wife, and  don't think for  a second your disdain doesn't show through. [/quote]

This is so patronizing and no wonder PP filters her female friendships.  See how little time it took for the Heathers to start chiming in. [/quote]

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