Reply to Why are middle school girls so mean?

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "Why are middle school girls so mean?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]If you have MS kids, but especially girls, I really recommend reading up on relational aggression: https://www.verywellfamily.com/relational-aggression-bullying-460498

And I agree with PPs that teachers and schools can help address it by calling it out. The reason this type of bullying is so insidious is that it doesn’t look like stereotypical bullying. It rarely involves kids openly stating that they don’t like another kid or being directly aggressive or threatening. While that kind of bullying can be scary, it is also much easier to address because you can easily identify the problem behavior. Plus there is actually something good about being able to clearly state your feelings, even if that feeling is “I don’t like Larlo he’s lame.” It’s direct, at least.

But relational aggression can mess you up in really horrible ways. That’s when the kid says, “Oh I loooove Larla, I just think it’s weird how much time she spends in the science lab. OMG do you think she has a thing for the bio teacher? That would be so funny!” It’s passive aggressive, it’s gaslighting, it’s gossip. But it often looks and feels like idle chatter and adults ignore it all the time (plus a LOT of adults act just like this all the time). A kid being targeted this way winds up feeling doubly isolated, both by the bullying itself and by the fact that no one seems to notice or care that it’s happening. It is terrible.

Anyway, if you have a MS kid, learn to recognize what this looks like. Ask questions. Don’t let your kids play dumb about it. And if your kid is being bullied this way, BELIEVE THEM when they tell you. You might not be able to stop the bullying, but you can at least ensure your child doesn’t have to suffer alone. Even just acknowledging that this is bullying, that it’s wrong, might give your kid the confidence to stand up to it, or to walk away from it. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics