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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am 44 and she’s is 30. I love my sister, shes extremely intelligent, funny and generous. However, she can also be her manipulative. I think I am frustrated because it has been over a year since she went to the ER and I felt she was finally at a better place with all this medical drama. I do recognize that if she ends up having spinal surgery this is very serious. I am worried about her. This is going to sound terrible, but I feel like this is one those situations where she went from specialist to specialist until someone agreed something was wrong with her. We all have minor medical issues that if we had dozens of scans, and test run, they would find something too.

-OP[/quote]

Hi OP, I am sorry that your sister has been suffering. It sounds like she may have a legitimate diagnosis to explain her symptoms. However, 
as a medical professional, I can confirm: if you look hard enough, you WILL find something. Unfortunately, it is not uncommon for patients with undiagnosable and/or functional disorders to undergo unnecessary interventions for incidental findings which are discovered during exhaustive workups. Seeing many different doctors, or doctor shopping, increases the likelihood of this. Most surgeons are judicious, but when you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail. These patients are suffering greatly, but the etiology of their suffering is often psychological. This doesn't make their suffering any less real or important, but it should change the approach to management.

I cannot say which category your sister belongs to, but I know as a professional and family member, providing constant attention and support can take a toll. Regardless of whether her illness is mainly physical or psychological, managing a chronic illness of any nature can take a psychological toll. Counseling, or medications, can similarly help both a functional fibromyalgia patient or a cancer patient cope with their physical and psychological distress. One can suggest therapy without implying "it's all in your head". Perhaps you could warmly encourage her to seek out therapeutic support to help her cope with her diagnosis (syrinx, chronic pain/headache/neuropathy, or otherwise).

FWIW, the sickest patients are often the most graceful. The worried well, on the other hand...[/quote]

Wow, this is one of the most infuriating posts I have ever read on DCUM. It certainly gives insight as to why those of us with severe and rare conditions get treated so badly by arrogant medical professionals. It took me literally ten years to get a diagnosis because of asshats like you. And guess what? As soon as the underlying rare (and life-threatening) medical issue was found and (expensive and rare) treatment started, all of the issues I had been struggling with for over ten years disappeared and have stayed gone for years.

You are a raging a**hole. I hope you know that. You are too arrogant to say "I don't know" and so you blame it on the patients and call them "worried well." You could be honest and say "I don't know," but instead you gaslight them, you tell them their symptoms are in their heads, you write coded and nasty notes in their charts so their next doctors don't take them seriously either, just to preserve your ego. You are awful, awful, awful. YOU are the reason I suffered for ten long years. [/quote]

+1 My older sister was treated just like this by her arrogant GP for several years. And then, just a day after seeing him for more symptoms that were concerning to her and him dismissing her once again, she dropped dead in the middle of a conversation with our elderly parents. Seriously, as my dad described it, she was gone before she even hit the floor. We don't even know what killed her. That and the complete unpreparedness of a single medical professional in this country to deal with coronavirus has made me more skeptical than ever about all of them.[/quote]

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