Reply to 1/4 of US Women may quit their jobs

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just having a kid impacted my career in a way that makes me the one best positioned to step back from work in this situation. I got mommy-tracked when I was pregnant ("we have to take this off your hands since you won't be here for closing"), struggled to catch up when I came back from maternity leave, and wound up transferring to a more flexible position with minimal travel before my kid turned one because [b]I was so miserable and stressed[/b] (and dealing with PPD) that I had to scale back somewhere.

So yes, my career is the easiest to hit pause on now, because it already took a huge hit in both trajectory and pay several years ago. This isn't me "stepping back". This is an economic system that just ignores pregnancy, childbirth, and parenthood as valuable acts, and the people who perform the get screwed. The end.

Stop blaming women for not conquering institutionalized sexism all by themselves with individual choices that are often dictated by forces beyond our control.[/quote]

Why were you miserable and stressed? I am a lawyer and my husband and I have flip flopped between who makes more. After our twins were born and I went back to work after maternity leave, HE stepped up to ensure that I had an easier time returning from work. I basically had to focus on myself and spend time with my kids and he handled the other issues like childcare, groceries, cooking, etc.

You say that our current economic system ignores parenthood and the people who perform that task get screwed, but what you really mean is WOMEN. Yes, men can't be pregnant, and they can't give birth, but beyond that, take some ownership of your own choices and those of your husband. My husband doesn't have an easy job or one that doesn't require travel, but he MADE it happen after we had kids, because it shouldn't be all on me.

I know it's easier to yell at someone who sounds like they're criticizing your life choices, so ok. But maybe spend some time really reflecting about what exactly happened in your situation and how your husband could have been the one to make changes in his career to help our so that you weren't so miserable or stressed. Also, I'm not saying there aren't issues in our society, because there are, but I just find it a little cringe-inducing when people refuse to acknowledge any responsibility whatsoever for their own actions.[/quote]

Smug. Privileged.[/quote]

Yes, I am privileged. But given that PP was saying she was missing out on closings and had a job that required travel, I doubt she was working retail or some other lower-level job before she had kids, so she is also likely very privileged. If the privileged women and their husbands don't try to do something about the current situation, who do you think will? They are exactly the people who are positioned to make some sort of meaningful change, not some GS-7 who doesn't have any leverage. And smug? You can call me that if you want, but not if you're going to use it as an excuse to not doing anything. I think women AND MEN should push harder for better changes that make workplaces more friendly to women who have children. Those women need to not be treated as second-class citizens, and the dads should be granted similar flexibility to contribute as parents. If you want to just call me names and dismiss that, then fine, but I'll still keep fighting for better circumstances for working moms. You're welcome.[/quote]

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