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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Unless there’s something specific that’s happened to your daughter by this kid you should just invite her. [/quote]

Op here. She didn’t do anything specific to my child. But last summer there was a birthday party for another kid, at which a little boy of Latin American descent was a guest. The girl in question told him that he needed to prove to everyone he’s American otherwise he didn’t belong at the party. They were all seven years old at the time. Seven. My daughter wasn’t at that party but apparently the little boy went home in tears and all the other parents were outraged.

I want my home to be a safe place for all kids. I don’t want any child to experience this kind of hatred and to invite her would feel like I’m just turning a blind eye to it. [/quote]

Yup, that would be the dealbreaker for me. It's not fair to the other kids and their families. My kid and I socialize with all kinds of people. If my kid really wanted to, I would consider an individual playdate with this kid, but I would closely supervise and intervene to correct any remarks the one above.[/quote]

Wow.  Even after knowing that the kid herself is a racist and had hurt a Latino child, you’d be fine with her as a playmate for your child.  In private. So essentially, offering the private wink wink stamp of approval and telling your child that what she said is literally socially acceptable.  What is wrong with you?!!

[/quote]

I'm a queer, white woman and I'm heavily involved in racial justice organizing. In every memoir or reflection that I've read by a person who was a white supremacist and then realized they were wrong, that person described being exposed to people with antiracist beliefs who didn't offer approval but did engage with them and show a different way to live that wasn't so fearful and fueled by hatred. I have people in my own family I've been working on for decades. So, yeah, I feel it is my moral duty to recruit other white people to anti-racism, and it's miserable work that, if it ever works, takes a really long time. The alternative is leaving people to hang out in white supremacists echo chambers. This is an established organizing technique and has it's roots in calls during the mid-60s and on for white people to go work toward racial justice in their own communities. There is more info on this website, if you are interested: https://www.showingupforracialjustice.org/[/quote]

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