Reply to Inflexible, Perfectionist Parents, How Did You Relax Your Parenting?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP Here. I know parents of 4 who will use tylenol PM to put their fussy child to sleep on tough nights.  One classmate of my daughters already has several capped teeth. She's constantly sucking on lollipops when we see her at the park. Another child gets a ham sandwich for lunch every day, despite telling her mom she's committed to vegetarianism.  She confessed to me that she likes coming to my home for playdates because I don't force her to eat meat.  (My kids are vegetarian by choice; DH & I are not. Yet, accommodate everyone's dietary preferences.)

I'm sure all the parents above think they're doing a great job.  I happen to be very hyper-critical and self aware. The world is full of clueless people who think they're doing an awesome job.

The world isn't so black and white.  I'd love to hear more nuanced answers from people who understand the benefits (and downsides) of being conscientious and, yes, perfectionist.

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You are not great or awesome.
You are not the  idea parent.
You are not doing it better than everyone else.
You have nothing to be smug about.

Your children tell other moms that they like going to their house because they can touch things and eat normal food. The moms then judge you harshly.
The mom doesn’t like coming to your home for play dates.  She is lying and being passive aggressive towards you but you are so smug you can’t see thought her.[/quote]

OP here. You must made my point. I agree with most of  your criticisms. Except I don’t believe you’re any better thank I am. While I see your flaws, I am not full of venom. I don’t approve of some parenting techniques, but It doesn’t make me want to “take them down a notch.” We all make sacrifices somewhere, and I understand their priorities are different. That’s curious to me, not a threat. Obviously, I wish I could shift mine.

Or maybe that makes me smug to reply smugly to a smug poster. :)

BTW, You think you know what the child I had over for the play date was thinking? How? You could be right or wrong. [b]More likely, you only see what you want to see.
[/b]
[/quote]

Yes, you are right, that is an accurate description of yourself  :D

Listen no one ever thinks you are perfect. Moms like you are fun and easy targets to make fun of via passive aggressive remarks.  Except you are so smug you really truly believe what others tell you.

If a mom tells you "Good for you for doing xyz" or "I would love to have a house as clean and tidy, no toys and now mess " or " I wish we could eat all organic but my kids" 
- any of these are the start to snark.  the rest of the moms are in on it while you sit there beaming like an idiot.

Please like yourself enough to take meds . [/quote]

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