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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. So I told my husband about what happened (after kids went to sleep), and he was more concerned about me.  My 8yo actually pleaded with me NOT to tell my husband.  I AM concerned about her, I think after she realized the seriousness of what had happened, she was traumatized and very upset with herself that she had royally messed up.

Apparently she didn't see the part where I passed out.  Either she didn't think I was really unconscious, or she didn't know what me being unconscious really meant and that it was an actual emergency. I don't want her to blame herself, I want to make sure she knows what to do in these situations.

Same with my 5yo, but he seems to be actively avoiding talking about what happened, so I am having trouble getting through to him.  The whole thing was kind of scary - to me, and I'm sure to my kids.  I believe my 5yo has some anxiety issues too - we've actually had a few losses in our family not too long ago, and he did recently go through a stage where he was very anxious about dying - for himself and for us, and asking a million questions about what happens after you die.  So I'm wondering if the reality of the situation is just too scary for him to really process.

I can't help feeling like my connection to my kids was affected.  If they were adults and reacted the way they did, I'd be furious and would feel like I couldn't trust them.  But they are kids, and rationally I know that, but still it brings me to tears knowing that they reacted the way that they did.  I'm trying to get some perspective here because I know I'm emotional and not thinking rationally.  But some of you have said out loud the things I've thought - that they must be broken somehow, that maybe I have failed them in that I haven't been able to teach them to be basic decent human beings.  I still haven't been able to bring myself to hug my 5yo after the incident.  I think I'm still processing it all myself.[/quote]

It sounds like a difficult situation for all of you.  And you and the kids could use a little bit of therapy.  At least a few sessions.  There is no shame in getting help.  I know you want this all to be okay and just to go away.  But it's not okay and you know that.[/quote]

OP, I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I'm sorry for the harsh blowback you are getting in some of the responses. I do think all of you could benefit from therapy, and the kids could benefit from some additional evaluation. I understand that there is a range of "normal/acceptable" but you need to be thinking about what steps you need to take now to set you kids up for success later. If your 5 year old boy continues to be usually strong for his age AND continues to engage in rough play AND doesn't learn how to take cues from people when they tell him to stop--it's setting him up for getting into a serious injury-causing incident with another kid at his school. I'm not saying this to make you feel bad, or that you did something wrong, or that he is "broken"--I'm saying you have identified an issue and now you can proactively do things to make the situation better. Take care of yourself.
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