Reply to DD’s friend suspended for drugs; Disinvite?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Glad you got more information about the situation, OP, and sounds like a serious situation.

I don't know why some people are so casual about marijuana use in teens - the science is pretty clear.  The even bigger thing for me is that she was using at school, and possibly charging for hits as well.  Huge red flag.  It's not like she was experimenting at home - it was at school, and involving other kids, and she was so likely to be caught, which she must have known.  This kid seems to have bigger issues that need attention and help, and it's not up to your child to fix another kid.  And even without the new information you have every right as a host to decide who comes to your home and who your child spends time with, and what you are comfortable with.  And it's not your child's responsibility to include the girl despite her discomfort about her marijuana use, just so that the child could avoid the "devastation" of being disinvited.  It's a party, for goodness sakes, and it's your family's party. Kids need their parents' backup when they are uncomfortable, as there is often good reason.  If there isn't, that's another conversation, but it sounds like she had good reasons to be uncomfortable.

But anyway...sounds like things are more clear now and your gut was telling you something.[/quote]

No way in hell I’d alllw this girl in my house after what happened. Have some backbone! The last thing I’d be worrying about is the “devastation” of uninviting her.[/quote]

Yes -- because that is exactly what you want to happen to your own kid when she cheats on a test, skips school, or drinks, or smokes, or does something with a boyfriend/girlfriend.  Nathaniel Hawthorne has some letters that you can hand out.  Or -- you could, you know, be talking to your own kid about how to treat folks who are acquintences/friends.

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