Reply to How hard to find a 1/2 time boyfriend in early 40s?

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Reply to "How hard to find a 1/2 time boyfriend in early 40s?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]OP here: Thanks. I will not do that to my kids. I think that men have an easier time understanding why I want what I want than women. I am more practical and less emotional than most women I am friends with. I think men can understand from a practical perspective what I am after. I think a lot of women do not get it (hence asking me if I have been assessed for mental illness, which is ridiculous). I simply do not want to make my kids lives more difficult. But I would like some physical and a tiny piece of emotional needs met (just feeling desired is an emotional need...that is how I am definining it). My kids don't need to know about that. It is not that hard to understand.[/quote]

OP, I'm a 50 yr old amicably divorced woman and I completely understand where you're coming from.  You are correct, a lot of women in our demographic don't support what we are after.  My best friend cannot understand for the life of her why I don't ever want to set up house again with a 50-something divorced dad and combine our teenage kids and start all over with inlaws.   Um, no thanks.

Anyway, I sort of have what you're looking for, except my 1/2 boyfriend is not actually exclusive — and that is making logistical planning difficult.  He's frequently not available for me when I finally have some free time, because he's at a party or spending quality time with his other woman friend.

This issue is going to be the catalyst that drives me to finally make a dating app profile, to broaden my options.

And …. To all the weirdly projecting jerks who imagine that OP and I are in deep denial about our actual emotional neediness …. no I'm not.  I just want a guy who is available somewhat reliably.   I don't care that he also enjoys the company of other women. I don't want to be on the special snowflake pedestal of admiration and fawning.  I just want a guy to be available for fun and conversation **somewhat** reliably.   If he's too frequently unavailable — due to work, marathon training, religious practices, dating 5 women at a time, kids' travel soccer, WHATEVER THE REASON—- this is frustrating.   I'd feel the same way about a platonic girlfriend or a plumber or a math tutor for my kid.   It has nothing to do with emotional holes. It's pragmatic.[/quote]

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