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[quote=Anonymous]No judgement here, but to answer the OP question:
My mom told me about my dad's affair, which ended their marriage, when I was 21.  
My older sister had discovered, or at least strongly suspected, when they divorced. She was 15 at the time, I was 11.

She had a horribly screwed up relationship with our dad throughout her teens and twenties. I couldn't understand as a teen why she was so angry at him, why she seemed to hate him so much. And (although I didn't understand this was connected at the time) I also didn't get why she kept getting into such dysfunctional relationships with boyfriends during high school and college.  She truly hated our father as an adolescent, and it F-ed up her relationship with him and with boys.

I've always been close to my dad.  When I learned about the affair, it was a shock ... But I was able to separate that action from my relationship with my dad. Yes, I hate what he did ... But that doesn't mean I hate him.  I'm still very close with both of my parents.  My sister has come around, but it took decades.

So based on my experience, I'd say teens is a terrible time to tell. That's when kids are learning about romantic relationship. It's a horrible thing to impose on them then.  I'd advise 20s or never.[/quote]

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