Reply to Ok to vacation without all the kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thinking ahead will you pay for step kids college? What about cars? Will your DC get a car and not step kids?  
All 3 children are DH and should be treated equally [/quote]

You're assuming DH has the money.  That doesn't have to be the case.

My DH has a daughter from a previous relationship.  I am the moneymaker in the family while DH makes a low salary.  Our two kids lead a much better lifestyle than his daughter.  I don't feel any guilt about that.  I don't understand why you insinuate it's her job to pay for her stepkids' college or cars.  That's on DH.  It's the parents' job to support their children, not their subsequent spouses. [/quote]

And the evil stepmother speaks.  Do you make your stepchildren clean your fireplaces, too?

Ugh.  When you marry a person who has a child from a previous marriage, caring for that child is a part of the package.  If you aren't willing to participate in caring for that child, do everyone a favor and find someone else, preferably someone with no children.  Your callousness to an innocent child who is the victim of two parents who could not find a way to maintain their marriage through personal troubles is appalling.  It's sad that her father has such poor judgment of people that he would consider marrying someone as ruthless as you who would create such a two tier system to a child.[/quote]

So dramatic. The two-tiered system already exists for everyone. Tier 1: your children.  Tier 2: everyone else's children.  Why pretend it's not so?

That child has a mother and a father.  I am kind and caring to her when I'm around her, but funding her college education or her cars is not my job.  My money belongs to my children.  Her mother and father should take care of her college and cars. They can always get better jobs if they are not happy with their current income.  Marrying a higher-income woman in hopes she will fund your previous children is nonsense. [/quote]

Actually, re: her college education, your income will count against her financial aid at many colleges... My step-mother's did against mine. (I would have qualified for some aid based on my parents' income. My mother earned high/mid-5 figures and my dad is retired for health-related reasons w/ a similar investment income. Based on my college's estimates, I would have gotten around $30,000 aid/year... Except my step-mother's income threw all of that out the window.) Thankfully, in the end, she agreed to help pay. Please don't screw your DH's daughter because you think your husband or her mother should be earning more. And, no, not everyone "can always get better [paying] jobs" just because they want to.[/quote]
We can divorce on paper before her college applications are due, if that's the case. Remember, it's not your stepmother who screwed it up for you. It's your parents who didn't save enough. It's unfortunate that the laws count her income against you but I trust you can see that it is simply not her responsibility. It just isn't. Supporting you is the job for your parents, or for the state. She can help if he wishes but it's not her job. [/quote]

You have a cold, cold heart.[/quote]

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