Reply to Husband isn't good provider and I secretly hate him for it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not sure why a gov't employee plus a second income can't afford a home in a decent area and have to rent a tiny apartment unless you have tons of debt we don't know about or a special situation (supporting elderly parents , etc.)[/quote]

This. DH and I are both government lawyers. We have a "shitshack" 1000 sq ft SFH in Bethesda and send 2 kids to daycare. It's tight because of the daycare but doable. Once day care is not in the picture it will be much more comfortable. And we picked Bethesda for the schools (right or wrong). If you want a huge house in an expensive area on 2 government salaries, you will be disappointed. But there's no reason you can't get a decent, if small, place in a close-in suburb, or a bigger place in a farther-out suburb like Rockville or Fairfax.[/quote]

There's quite a bit of distance between "shitshack" and "huge house in huge expensive area."  Even a shitshack in Bethesda runs you well into the high 6 figures. Then you get into the "slightly okayish house that would be worth 250k elsewhere, but is 1.4 million in Bethsda" category, and so on.  [/quote]

Dual government family here and we have what I feel is a fantastic house in an awesome school district in bethesda for under 1 mil. Sure, it needs updating, but it's really a great house. And we both get to enjoy it tons with the kids because of our super flex schedules and government lifestyle. And yet the preschool one of my kids is at is filled with families like OP. The money is mind boggling to me. My dh also has that potential if he went private (I don't). But he'd miss out on a lot of time with us... also, my career takes me to parts of the world with true poverty in ways most Americans can't imagine. We have it so good here... And I want my kids to grow up feeling that rather than entitled.

Op--you need to focus on what you do have and how lucky you are.[/quote]

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