Reply to Am I rude for staying in a hotel?!

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your SIL is a bitch. I would ignore. If she was somehow expecting lots of help from you, she is a terrible hostess. [/quote]

Wow, I would never expect to just eat and drink and be catered to as a guest. Hosting is a lot of work. I'm so glad my guests always offer to contribute. I do the lion's share, but in our family, everyone helps and is grateful for being hosted.[/quote]

If they are helping, they are not a guest and you are not a hostess. Call it "having family over" if it makes you feel better, but it's not hospitality. [/quote]

eh, a guest bringing a hot dish and/or helping out with the dishes does not diminish the role of the host at all.  Offering to help out the host at a friendly Thanksgiving gathering seems pretty basic actually.[/quote]
NP, guests don't set up or clean up. Those are the duties of the host. I agree with PP, what your describing is having dinner at your house.[/quote]

I am not going to go to a formal dinner with caterers, etc and offer to help with the dishes.  But at a friendly Thanksgiving dinner I will always at least offer to help out simply to show my appreciation for their efforts in hosting the dinner.  Whether or not the host takes me up on it is always up to the host.  But either way the host is still the one hosting the dinner.  I am still the guest whether I help out or not.

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