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[quote=Anonymous]So let me get this straight:  Inviting the dad who cheated on the mom, if he comes by himself, to the wedding is fine--as long as he doesn't bring the woman he cheated on the mom with.  Even though at this point the mom and dad are legally divorced.

What I don't really get is, if the affair partner of the dad is persona non grata, and not wanted as a wedding guest, then the dad with or without his affair partner, should also be persona non grata, since it was he who cheated on the mom, and it was he who involved the affair partner in the first place.

So this is where the logic completely fails.  It seems to me, if as a matter of principle or feelings or whatever, you are going to bar the affair partner from the wedding, then you also have to bar the father who cheated, without regard to whether or not his affair partner is in attendance.

If on the other hand you say "But he's my father so I HAVE to invite him," all well and good, but then I think you lose any moral authority to bar the affair partner from the wedding assuming everyone is invited with a +1.  The parents are after all DIVORCED at this time.  She is no longer the affair partner, she is the former affair partner/current significant other.

The whole point of getting divorced is that it is the legal cessation of the marital relationship.   They are no longer married.  They need to put it behind them, and that would include acknowledging that each of the divorced partners is entitled to have a relationship with whoever suits them.

Focusing the anger and the blame on the affair partner is misplaced.  Certainly she is not an admirable person for being involved with a married man, but if the real issue is that resentment and animosity still lingers for what the father did, then be upfront about that and disinvite HIM to the wedding in a straightforward manner.  Then there won't be any issue about the affair partner being in attendance either.[/quote]

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