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Schools and Education General Discussion
Reply to "Field Trips"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] That sends two messages - one, [b][i]she's[/i] not really trustworthy, and two, adults other than you or dad or the teacher can't really be trusted. [/b]That's not what you want her to feel, and you'll say that of course SHE's trustworthy, she's just smart and gets delayed reading stuff, etc. but that is not how she will think of it in her kid's mind. You can tell her all day that it's not about her, she's great, etc., but what you tell her and what she'll feel can be two very different things. She'll internalize the idea that mom and dad can't let her do things without their being there, so there must be some reason she's different from the other kids whose parents aren't on every single field trip. And she'll wonder if there's something "off" about every other adult so maybe she should be suspicious and scared. .[/quote] But the truth is that the kid is [i]not[/i] trustworthy, and OP doesn't trust anyone other than herself or her spouse. So OP is sending the correct message. Until the kid learns how to behave on a field trip, she should not be allowed to go on one without her parents. I feel that OP is doing the other chaperones a favor here -- I know I wouldn't want to be saddled with watching kids like OPs during a field trip. [/quote] OP here - I do want to clear up that I don't believe DH and I are the only ones to be trusted with her. They've both started in a home daycare at 6 weeks old and we have babysitters all of the time. That doesn't address being outside the house without us, but I think demonstrates that we've trusted our kids to others from the very beginning. We trust her with most family members and many friends of ours. My kids go off with these other adults quite often without us. I was shocked by the lack of supervision, however, that I saw in the parents that went on the field trips that I have attended. This may not be the case for every school, but most of the moms couldn't bother to stop talking to each other for a minute to even look up to see where the kids they had been entrusted with were at. Some locations, this isn't really a bad thing At an over-crowded museum I thought it was negligent. Technically, DD is considered in the genius range for IQ so she does behave differently than a lot of kids in *certain* situations. Her mind goes beyond her actual maturity level and that can get a kid in trouble when a parent or trusted adults isn't around. Thinking she can do something that is dangerous and she knows is dangerous, but rationalizes that she knows best. She views everything in a logical way so that gut instinct just isn't there. So, if she gets separated, it doesn't even register that she needs to stop and go find an adult to get her back with her group. You might think, well once she realizes that she's separated from her group that logically she would think the next step is to get an adult to help her. But, in her case, if they are at a place that captures her interest and especially that has something to read she will just keep reading and ignore that gut instinct to get back with her group. Her brain prioritizes the absorbing of "fun" information is more important than staying with the group. Most of the time the other kids are walking pretty quickly through the exhibits and stopping to read a few things (so if she were to keep an eye on her group she wouldn't get anything out of the field trips any way.) She feels this way and prefers that she go to these places with us or a trusted friend so she can enjoy it her way. [/quote]
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