Reply to Did your parents cheat? How did you feel about it?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Eventually, Ossie and Ruby decided the open marriage was not for them because they found that they really fulfilled each other, but neither regretted trying it.  In the end, it is about respect and realizing your partner is a different person with different needs and aspirations. It is about your partner and not about you. Your jealousy is your problem, not theirs. If you both agree that you can both have outside relationships, it is just not cheating. The cgeating comes in the lies and deception, not the outside sex act. There are as many flavored of marriage as there are ice cream. Grab a spoon and dig in, but don't expect your flavor to be my favorite not force me to eat it.[/quote]

Bullshit. What your SPOUSE does sexually IS about you. It cannot fail to affect you emotionally and perhaps physically. The cheating most definitely comes from the sex act. You are completely deluded if you think you can redefine "marriage" in the terms you describe here. Whore it up all you want, but don't try to pretend it is a marriage, because it isn't.[/quote]
Who died and appointed you the arbiter of what marriage is?[/quote]

Thousands of years of human history, dumbass.[/quote]

Do you really want to hold up thousands of years of marriage history as the standard for what marriage should look like? Marriages where it was expected that the male would cheat, especially if his wife was about to have or had recently had his child, while a wife cheating would result in her social and economic ruin? How about the parts of history where women were actually given no input into who or when they married, when or how many children they bore or whether they even wanted to get married in the first place?

I'm the OP of the remark that has spurred the conversation about parents putting their needs before their kids' needs. I'm not pro-adultery, really, but being against cheating is not the same as being for a person letting their desire to be loved (whether emotionally or sexually or both) be completely disregarded because they believe that their children require a nuclear family. My parents are divorced, and I do not believe that their divorce ruined my childhood. My siblings do not believe that their divorce ruined their childhoods either (and they are younger than me so had more childhood to experience with divorced parents). I know that many people found their parents divorce to be ruining of childhoods, but it's certainly not a universal experience.

I suspect that you really just do not believe that parents are entitled to any happiness outside their children. [/quote]

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