Reply to Would you view this to be a breach of trust?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a wife I would probably consent to this, and if your wife won't even discuss it I think she is unreasonable. Given the above circumstances I would certainly donate. I know it's not a popular opinion given the previous 8 pages but I consider my friends family and would do anything for them. [/quote]

I'm a DH here and I came down pretty hard on the OP before.  Now that he's provided some context, I do see the complexity and the mitigating nature.  I agree it would be entirely unreasonable of his wife to not even discuss it.  Given the circumstances, hopefully she'd see it as you do and agree.  If her religious objections are so strong that she cannot envision this, or his friendship with a gay person, then I'd say they have a major, fundamental difference of values, and perhaps ought not be married.  Ideally her religious values would lead her to see this as an expression of love (and that god is love).

I can understand the people who refuse to consider their spouse being a donor (ie, insist it results in divorce) and feel they have a right to act accordingly, but it seems to me that if the wife knew ahead of time that he had this history, and this promise out there, and still married him (perhaps gambling the bill would never come due), then it's really on her.  Did the OP actually tell his wife ahead of time that he'd made this promise?

Ethically tough situation here; there is not an obvious right answer for the OP.  I hope the OP's 3rd party can persuade his wife.  [/quote]

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