Reply to How do I deal with this? SN son not invited to party but he thinks he is

Forum Index » Kids With Special Needs and Disabilities

Reply to "How do I deal with this? SN son not invited to party but he thinks he is"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
 
SN with social issues not not necessarily mean poorly behaved.  I am the PP of the child in 1st grade who was not invited to any birthday parties and was told he was by some of the other kids over the year.  (Yet, everyone came to his birthday.) He did not behave poorly from a parent or a teacher perspective.  He had trouble connecting with his peer group and a dynamic developed in the social order where he was at the bottom and it was horrible.   [/quote]

I continue to be appalled by the fact that parents think it's OK to let their young children accept birthday invitations that they have no intention of reciprocating. It' s pretty simple, folks. "Johnny, that's great that you want to go to Larlo's party at the bounce house, but keep in mind that if you go to his party, you need to invite him to yours." Full stop. This not not just about teaching your children empathy (god knows that's important, thought lots of people seem to cut corners where their own convenience or squeamishness or snobbishness or bias comes into play ); it's also teaching basic life skills, aka "how to get through the world without being perceived as a total jerk." [/quote]

Not all families have parties.  We cannot reciprocate as we have only done family only parties and up through this year choose our child's birthday to be our vacation vs. a party.  We have too much family drama and its not worth dealing with them.  Our child has never asked for a party so, for example for his 5th birthday, we went to Disney.  I think there is an expectation to do parties but I'm not spending a few hundred dollars for a young child's party when he does not care.

Its ok not to invite a child to a party.  There is a huge range of special needs, including our child.  I am ok with my child not being invited due to his special needs (most parents don't realize it or care as he isn't a behavior problem) or they just don't like him or us.  Not everyone is going to like everyone and its more uncomfortable going to a party where you or your child is not wanted vs. not being invited.[/quote]

PP here- to clarify, this obviously doesn't go for kids who aren't having a party with school friends. But if you're going to have a party with school friends, you'd darn well better invite the school friends' whose invitations YOUR kid accepted. You aren't required to invite everyone, but you should be such a jerk as to accept invitations from people you wouldn't deign to invite back. If you don't want to invite them to your party -- again, we're talking here about kids who are having their own parties with school friends -- please decline the invitation. It's very simple. 
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics