Reply to NYT: professional moms who opted out of work after kids are now opting back in

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Reply to "NYT: professional moms who opted out of work after kids are now opting back in"

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[quote=Anonymous]
I'm not that poster but I think the point is - what did you expect?  [b]Do you think that you should re-join the workforce at the same level as women who have made other choices, sacrificed time with their families, struggled with WOHM issues, etc?[/b]  Yes, it's unfortunate that the world works this way, but you made a choice and now you are paying for it.  You can't have your cake and eat it too.[/quote]  :roll:  There's a happy medium between your exaggeration and staring on the bottom of the ladder with the 2013 college grads. If she's qualified, why shouldn't she be able to start at the same level where she left off, or maybe just a notch down? [/quote]

Because she has been out of the game. I have no problems with SAH parents sacrificing their careers for their home. But I have a problem with them saying that the workforce is just supposed to accept them back open arms. Honestly, things have changed in the workplace, and it makes sense that after a large gap in their service, they need to reprove themselves. And those of us that have stayed and struggled with the issues of WOH should continue on their track. It's not bitterness, it's common sense. So if you come back making close to entry level, it makes sense. You are coming back and need to relearn your tricks. If you were truly on top of your game, you  should be able to rebound eventually. But there is no way that an employer will take you at your word that you can come back full speed. [/quote]

I am curious - what is it that you do?  What is "the game"?  I am a lawyer - worked Biglaw for many years before taking a break to stay home.  I can still write a brief.  I can still negotiate a settlement.  I have kept up with legal developments in my practice area.  I may be a tad rusty but I'd need about a month tops to get back into the swing of things.  Why would I need to "reprove" myself as a first year?  I don't think I should be rehired as a counsel or partner (which is what I would be if I stayed), but why wouldn't I go right back in as a senior associate (which is what I left as) if I chose to return?  Also, framing your issue as one of your "struggle" definitely sound like bitterness.[/quote]

Because you've shown your priorities to be elsewhere.  Which, again, is FINE and totally respectable, but to say you're as qualified/prepared/motivated as someone who's worked straight through to the senior associate level without time off is just false (and why situations you described - SAHMs coming back as senior associates - don't happen).  I'm not the pp you're responding to, but WOHM struggles do exist.  As do SAHM struggles.  To say they don't, and that the 'reward' (career success, continued earning power, financial independence) shouldn't belong to those who made the sacrifice - is naive and insulting.[/quote]

Yeah, the law market is saturated right now. You can't jump back in at the same level you were at because ten NON-rusty, super-motivated senior associates are lined up for every open position.

If you don't want to take the risk of not being where you would have been, you can't step out. Sometimes you get lucky and get right back in, but sometimes you don't. In this case, the bad economy and particularly hard-hit legal sector means you have bad luck. Don't forget that you may have been fired even if you had stayed. Nothing is a guarantee in life.[/quote]

I agree that i would have a hard time getting an equivalent job at a new firm but I've been assured by the leadership at my firm that I could have my job back whenever I want it, so I am not concerned about that.  My issue was more the assumption made by the mothers who never took time off that I don't deserve my job back.  To me that just sounds like bitterness and I don't understand it.  As I said, I don't want to be promoted to where I would be because I haven't earned that.  But I did earn the job I had and still am qualified for it.[/quote]

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