Reply to Q to the ladies: What gets you turned on?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]52 woman here. Good body, very confident, masculine. [b]Take charge. [/b][/quote]

Take charge of life generally.  Look around at what needs to be done and take care of it.  Make the dinner reservations, book the babysitter, make the meal plan and order the groceries.  Notice the sheets need changing and take care of that.  Book the vacation for the family.  [/quote]

Yes, amen. I do literally all of this, and I'm tired of it. [/quote]

Plus, the lack of initiative or opinions from my DH saps my desire. I'd be much more turned on by, "Let's go to [restaurant] on Friday. I'll make a reservation. And how about a drink first at [bar]?" It has been YEARS since my husband has made a plan. [/quote]

That would be so amazing!
I have an acquaintance (kids friends mom) who dropped that she and her husband were going alone for a long weekend. “Where are you going?” “Somewhere in Mexico.” “You’re leaving in two days and you don’t know where you’re going?” “Some resort I guess. My husband books these things. I’m just along for the ride. It always ends up being fun.” I was so freaking envious I could have thrown something.[/quote]

Why?  What is the big deal about planning a trip?  That’s the most fun part.

Some of you just want to be pissed off at your husbands.[/quote]

If it’s so much fun, why don’t men do it?  Why do people hire it out?

[/quote]

My husband doesn’t do planning for trips.  He doesn’t plan fun dates.  He doesn’t give me gifts.

But he makes me coffee and breakfast in the morning.  He takes care of the cars, he takes care of the dog, he takes care of the trash.  He does other chores too.

In other words he does his share.  But if I waited until he planned a trip or did something “romantic” we would never have sex again.[/quote]

Good for you? Some of us have/had husbands who don’t take care of anything, and are jerks on top of that.

My ex literally did nothing (I could tell stories that would raise your hair on end) but I actually enjoyed sex with him until he started getting physically aggressive. Then it was nope, nope, not ever again. [/quote]

If you don’t want to sleep with your husband because he is a jerk, then that’s fair.

If you don’t want to sleep with your husband because he doesn’t plan trips or dates and he hasn’t really done that stuff before, that’s not fair to him.  My husband and I don’t really have the time for a romantic “thing” every week, but I would certainly want to have sex more than once a week.  If you generally love your husband and he’s generally reasonable, you have to unlink your sexual desire from chores and unpleasant feelings.[/quote]

It's not about being romantic. It's about taking charge and getting things done, on his own initiative. That would be so awesome. [/quote]

Amen[/quote]

Yeah I’m not about that “choreplay”. I’m not turned on by you doing the dishes. But once my husband bought some flooring for the laundry room of his own accord and installed it because “it needed it.” He looked up how to do the install on YouTube. I dropped to my knees right there in that laundry room.[/quote]

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