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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I know it's scary. I'm sorry. Consult a few well-respected lawyers. They'll know better than us.

I'm in VA and I've shared this before on here. Keep in mind my ex offered this. He makes close to 7 figures and has a lot clients who have divorced. He said that anything over 16 or 17 years usually gets lifetime alimony so he just offered it -- we were married just shy of 20 years when we separated.

$10k/month lifetime alimony
$2.5k/month child support for two kids, drops to $1.8k for one
$4k month paying off my mortgage

Plus my half of the assets, some of which are rental properties that will some day make good money (but right now all the equity is sucked out by loans my ex took out -- he was always borrowing from Peter to pay Paul)

You've been married 20 years and he makes 10x as much as you do. I really don't believe a judge is going to tell you to suck it up. You are the poster child for spousal support. Fight for the support you have earned by investing in this marriage. Don't listen to the noise that is designed to make you keep sweet and obey. You were involved in a business arrangement -- marriage -- and there is a standard way to dissolve this that honors your non-monetary contributions. [/quote]

OP here. Thank you for sharing this. [/quote]

I am not sure on this but I think ALL alimony is only if the receiving ex-spouse does not get married again.[/quote]

Yes, or cohabitate. Though my ex agreed to waive this when I was like, "So you're paying me $10k/month for life and then clearly I just have my imaginary future boyfriend keep a cheap apartment and pretend he lives there? And then you're, what, counting how many nights I spend with said imaginary boyfriend? Like my sex and love life is the business of you and the state? And then we have to have a hearing to determine when it progresses from casual dating to more committed? I was a good and faithful wife and I would have remained so, but that's not what you wanted, and so therefore I have to be a sad nun for the rest of my life? How is this the spirit of the law?"

But obviously my situation is not the norm in a lot of ways. My lawyer was flabbergasted when he agreed. But he understood that I always brought my best self to the marriage, and he did not, and he at least is a good enough person to care about what is fair and right.[/quote]

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