Reply to Disclosing if you’re sleeping with other people

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Disclosing if you’re sleeping with other people "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP back with an update.

Larla (who is my best friend) gave Larlo another shot and went out with him last night. Also, for context, they had known each for awhile before dating and Larlo had actively pursued her before going out.

He was very handsy with her, tried to kiss her without asking multiple times, and when he dropped her off at her house, picked her up to try to carry her to the bedroom. After she told him she wasn't ready for physical intimacy, he still went ahead and grabbed her chest.

So, obviously it's a no now.[/quote]

I doubt this was the first sign Larla saw that he was pushy sexually. This doesn’t happen out of nowhere. What happened is that she excused it when she thought they were exclusive and now it because unacceptable. Also it is very odd that she would expect to ask him to ask for permission to kiss her after they were already sleeping together? [b]And why let him come to her house if she didn’t want to sleep with him? [/b]Obviously a woman has a right to decide what she wants to do, that’s not what I am saying. Just I get a strong sense that Larla does not have a great radar to understand when men are just in it for s*x and is likely fooling herself at how much she is into the s*x (because she believes they are exclusive).

Tl;dr - Larla needs to stop sleeping with men just because they want to sleep with her and she believes they are in a relationship. Hold out for someone she really likes and treats her the way she wants. [/quote]

Nope, nope, nope. Inviting a man over to your house does not give the green light for him to push himself on you sexually. That’s rape culture. [/quote]

Ugh your type is so tiresome.

Reread what I said. Nowhere did I excuse what he did assuming she clearly said no. What I did say is that Larla clearly doesn’t understand how dating works. It is not normal to expect someone to ask permission to kiss you after you are *already sleeping together* and it is also normal for someone who you are *already sleeping with* to think you are going to sleep together if you invite them over. Clearly Larla did not want any of this so why did she continue with the date after he made it clear he wanted what she did not? my belief is that he probably acted the same way on prior dates but Larla interpreted it in a totally different was when she mistakenly believed they were exclusive. Larla needs to get much more savvy about reading the signs and ALSO needs better boundaries around sex. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics