Reply to Do you have an age cut off on supporting adult kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]i think it is ridiculous for parents to be supporting "kids" well into their 40s.  my neighbor does this, and she has some money, but nothing like 30 million.  IMO it hinders their growing up and being responsible for themselves.

my kids have been on their own since starting their first jobs.  each has lived at home for a bit.  one, until she got married (a year or so) and the other, during the covid times.  she paid for an apartment in another city while she lived with us.

we do take them on a vacation once a year, but other than that, they are on their own.

we don't have enough to help with down payments.[/quote]

So you might think differently if you had "more money".  We are at the 30M+ level, so yes we will help our kids as we deem appropriate.  However, they must all have a career path and be working 40 hour/week jobs for this to happen.  It doesn't "hinder their growing up".  Our funds help ensure they max their retirement (this 24 yo would be putting away 15-18% without our help).  Instead of driving a 10+ year old vehicle, they got a new one, so there are not any mechanical issues (they have a job they have to be in office for---limited amount of time to work from home for appointments/taking car in for servicing, etc).  But the old care was running fine and they could have gotten another 3-5 years out of it.  But we have the $$ so why make them wait?  
Our kid also saves for other things and lives within a budget (they can afford their apartment and all monthly living expenses...but they wouldn't save as much---only 15% for retirement and another 5%).  If they chose to buy a $100K vehicle, we wouldn't fund that.  
[/quote]

Stop controlling your kids with money.  My parents did that and then threw it up to us and finally we wouldn't accept a dime and it destroyed our relationship as they didn't know how to have one without controlling us.  In 15 years they haven't given us anything and we pay if we go out to eat.  They barely have a relationship with their grandkids as they try control them with money too.[/quote]
We don't control our kids with money.  
But we refuse to help them out to just sit at home and do nothing.  And yes if you think you can buy a $100K veichlenin a $85k salary well then I guess you don't need any financial assistance.  
Thankfully we raised our kids well and they are fiscally sound people with goals in life.  
They are happy to join us on trips and to visit any chance they get and we happily pay.  
They also know they have trust funds for the future.  But they don't just get to sit at home and play video games and use that to fund their lives.  We are setting them up to be successful in life.

Sorry your parents were controlling.  We are not.  And our kids don't think so rather--they are happy to have college and grad school paid for, new cars after graduation paid for and help setting up their first apartment [/quote]

You are controlling them.[/quote]

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