Reply to Do you have an age cut off on supporting adult kids?

Forum Index » Money and Finances

Reply to "Do you have an age cut off on supporting adult kids?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have two in college, and it's obviously the most they have ever cost us. Tuition/ dorm we pay for with 529, but there is car insurance, healthcare, huge amounts of food they consume when at home which is a large part of the year given college schedule. They do work but so far are only using their money for their own "fun spending" and saving. At what point do you stop supporting kids financially? Did you stop cold turkey after college? Or did you phase things out so they progressively became independent? I read that 64% of parents support their Gen Z kid but that is not such a helpful stat given the age range of gen Z including college kids.[/quote]

When they finish college and get set up, [b]if you cannot afford to help them anymore. [/b]

We help our kids after college for extras, because they live within their means but we want them to save more for retirement and a future downpayment, and because they will get millions eventually so it's best to gift it earlier to impact their lives.  However, that only happens if they are working and leading a meaning full life (ie. they have a job, they live within their budget for that job, etc basically they need to be responsible and have goals in life and not just spend spend spend)
[/quote]

This is the part I struggle with. We are fine and stable financially but not DCUM wealthy. We had zero help ourselves after 18 so everything we have is just through saving and hard work, which also has meant a lot of sacrificing and not that much life enjoyment just for ourselves. If we spend thousands a month supporting dcs, we cannot also spend every month for fun things like going out to eat or travel. And at some point, maybe I am feeling selfish but I would like to do these things more.[/quote]

I think it is completely reasonable to take your own circumstances into account.  There is no need to be a martyr for your adult kids.  And this doesn’t have to be all or nothing, what I think is critical is that your kids understand what help they will get and when it will end.

Maybe that is they can move home after college and live rent free and all other expenses are on them.  Maybe it is less or maybe it is more.

Getting them through college debt free is a huge gift.  I think at that point all you owe them is honesty so they are not surprised.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics