Reply to How to Deal with an Angry Sibling re: Elderly Parents

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "How to Deal with an Angry Sibling re: Elderly Parents"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So the mom was "abusive" and OP "distanced" herself from the family on purpose long ago.

TYPICAL DCUM POST BURYING THE LEAD

She writes a friggin' novel for her first post then after everybody chews her out she returns with these critical missing details.

[/quote]

Screw you. I was upset as I was writing the initial post.

Another poster accused me of writing too long of an initial post and now I didn't write enough. [/quote]

Ah, ok, so now we see your true self.  You're unhinged.  And not very nice.  Another thing that was very clear from your first post if that there was more than one side to this story.  You've now confirmed it.

You need help alright.  But of the professional kind.  A therapist.  You don't need our help.[/quote]p

Honestly, everyone in this family seems dreadful. There’s no one to root for here.[/quote]

I’m rooting for the brother.  He is taking care of parents solo while also dealing with op’s bs.[/quote]

Not me. He chose to MOVE BACK to his parents’ town and is now shocked Pikachu face that he is the primary caregiver? DUH.[/quote]

Agreed.  I can see this happening in my life - when my father passed away, my parents were looking at retirement/assisted living/continuing care facilities.  They live a long drive/short flight away from us; my sister lived near them.  When my mother started thinking about moving into the place they'd put a deposit on, my sister suggested that she and my mother move in together.  I (very carefully-my sister and I are not close, and have a fraught relationship in the best of times) raised some concerns - my grandmother moved in with us when my grandfather passed away, and it took a tremendous toll on my mother - but they decided to do it.  So they sold both of their places, and moved into a new build that is set up perfectly from a physical plant standpoint.  But all of a sudden, my very smart mother has become totally dependent on my sister, and abdicated all decision-making to her.  My sister is becoming increasingly overwhelmed, and harried, and it's only a matter of time before she starts asking for my active participation in day to day life.  But my sister is becoming increasingly controlling, and unwilling to entertain questions/other opinions.  So, I get OP's dilemmas - it is difficult to do day to day caregiving when you live a long way away, and if you aren't local and the local person is not willing to keep you in the loop, how are you supposed to know how to assist?

tl;dr - I have a lot of sympathy for OP, but I also don't know the right way to proceed.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics