Reply to Genuinely don’t understand why people get worked up about weddings

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't get exercised about it, but I truly do not understand people who think weddings should be restricted to adults. Every wedding I've been to, my friends' weddings, my side of the family, or my husband's side, has been very child-friendly. My family is white European, my husband's family is East Asian. We all believe weddings are multi-generational occasions, and that they are, in fact, an elevated form of family reunion (the union of two families, babies to great-grandparents). Weddings have occurred in Europe, East Asia and the Americas.

It's only here on DCUM that I've learned some proportion of people (mostly caucasian American, I'm guessing) defend adult-only weddings. But since it hasn't affected me personally, I haven't had the opportunity to get annoyed about it. I have fond memories of my 2 year old dancing on the dance floor in the wee hours and then sleeping soundly on two chairs. And of my small nephews laughing at the horse's poo at my wedding: we had a horse-drawn carriage rides to my family castle. Fun times.

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Weddings here used to be mostly like this (I'm sure there have always been Gilded Age children-free weddings), and then the "wedding industry" spread the princess dream.  The fact that many people aren't very religious anymore and don't really understand what weddings were about has also contributed to these new norms.

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It’s completely possible to have an elegant, adults “only” (excepting nursing babies) affair and still invite children, you just have to put a little time and resources behind it. I mentioned above it cost $2000 or so in my wedding, I had a cousin with an all-out, six figure wedding and mu daughter (three at the time) still talks about it— kids took pictures with the bride and groom, had activities in the hotel during the ceremony, had a kid friendly dinner in a separate space, were invited to the reception for one dance, and then were off to movies. Hotel staff brought them wedding cake, and the kids decorated the door to the bridal suite. That probably ran $5000 but in a six figure wedding who noticed?[/quote]

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