Reply to Is it normal not to love your elderly parent who is not abusive or mean?

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Reply to "Is it normal not to love your elderly parent who is not abusive or mean?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I remember reading somewhere that kids want to love their parents. They do bad things, and kids still hold on to the hope.

I don't think it's normal to not want to love your parents. My guess is that you believe that too, otherwise you wouldn't be asking here.

You might get curious about it. Why are you withholding? Are you afraid to say I love you to him for some reason? I think pp's may be on to something when they say you're afraid of being the same. Also, it's curious that you say your conversations are uninteresting, but it takes two people to have an uninteresting conversation. What about asking him to tell you about the past.

Therapy might help if you journal/try new tactics/sit with the feelings and no progress. [/quote]

He’s already told me about the past, we can’t talk about it every week. 
He also tried to tell me how he was bullied as a child and his parents didn’t protect him, but I think it’s inappropriate to tell this to one’s daughter and I don’t want to hear it. [/quote]

You are wrong. It’s not at all inappropriate to tell this to one’s daughter. [/quote]

It's completely inappropriate, adult children are not your therapists and we don't want to be burdened with your unresolved issues! There's nothing we can do about them! I understand OP. My mom is like this. These are weak people, emotionally immature, who have relied on someone else to make decisions for them their whole lives. Yes, they cling. Yes, they're selfish and don't care about others, including grandchildren. They're afraid to miss out on resources and be abandoned to figure things out for themselves! They'd gladly move in with you not be be responsible for themselves and use your resources. There's not much of an advice other than you'll end up doing for him as much as you're willing to, because he'll always expect more. This is why you have resentment. [/quote]

Curious, how much of inheritance do you expect?[/quote]

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