Reply to Are you paying or contributing to your kids weddings?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If a couple can’t afford to pay for their own wedding, they aren’t ready to get married.

Yes, that may mean downsizing the event, but maybe it will help the couple focus on tbings that are actually important.

A gift check from parents is nice, but only if it is truly a gift and not a way to weasel into planning the wedding. [/quote]

Except some kids would prefer to just elope, yet their parents want to be there. My aunt and uncle refused to give their son (gave their daughter 50k the year before) any money for his wedding and he eloped instead. They were devastated. Actions have consequences. A lot of parents have massive demands. You can't demand anything when it's not your own wedding.[/quote]

Except some places like Long Island and New Jersey people write the check at the reception, I would give [b]$1,000[/b] at a fancy wedding the one where there are food trucks and tap beer I might give [b]tops $200 bucks[/b]. So cheap weddings can cost more. The trick is not to go over the top, but not so cheap people give you $100 buck gifts. [/quote]

Wow. How well do you know these people? $100 seems like a pretty good gift, depending on how close you are to them. [/quote]

$100? Are you on crack? Also closeness does not matter that much. I went to an old neighbors daughters wedding of a women we have not seen in 8 years. Just me, wife and younger daughter. I gave $800 and thought cheap as nice weddings are at least $250 a person. A few weeks early went to my nephews really fancy  wedding the three of us gave $1,000 and that wedding must have been $350 a person so I was actually cheap.

Even a DJ, tent, open bar, decorations, catered food in backyard is above $100 a person

I hardly call covering my plate overly generous.

Generous was in 1998 at my wedding which was $150 a person I got a few $500 to $1,000 per couple gifts. Most gave $200 a couple which was nice but not overly generous and one or two gave $75 which was FU money even in 1998. 
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Covering your plate is a low class Long Island gypsy mentality.

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