Reply to DD dyed her hair pink and I’m not mad but am concerned

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why do you believe that dyeing your hair pink is a cry for help?[/quote]

NP and I disagree it’s a “cry for help” but it’s definitely a “please notice me” statement that contains a message.
And that could be anything from “I wanna have some kind of identity other than the boring-haired brunette I am” to “all the cool kids have dyed hair and I wanna be cool too” to “my family is so conservative and I’m so edgy and this is my first step in the process of rebellion” to “I’m depressed and outcast and this is my way to get you to ask me about how I’m doing or for me to fit in with other outcasts”
And however OP reads it, the solution isn’t grounding or punishment. It’s communication! Get curious, OP, and ask your teen to tell you about it. Express genuine interest in learning more about why she made the choice and what led up to it. Just say “I wasn’t expecting you to do that because we hadn’t talked about it. But I’d love to hear more about what led you to want to dye your hair pink….” and see where that leads.
Maybe it’s nothing, maybe it’s something…but ask and you’ll know instead of worry.[/quote]

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